About Me

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Springfield, MO, United States
A few facts about me... i love my family. i have a more than precious little girl, Ava. i find my only source of strength in Christ. i love my friends. i'm loud. i love to laugh. i really like to dance although only my true friends have seen it. rain is my favorite. i smile at all strangers. i love to take care of people. i love harry potter. the only time i eat popcorn is at the movies. i could eat hot wings everyday. i strive to make my brothers laugh. i love football. i can't go a day without music. i hate fixing my hair. i wish i had dreadlocks. i only like coffee drinks that don't taste like coffee. knock-knock jokes crack me up. i love to read. i hate school but love to learn. i want to live in ireland. i live in springfield. i love to be barefoot. my favorite smell is glass cleaner. i hate shopping. i hate when people think they are better than everyone else. i love funny people. i like tattoos. these are just a few things that make me me.
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Thursday, November 29, 2012

Family.



fam•ily
noun. 1. a social unit consisting of one or more adults together with the children the care for and look after. 2. a group of people who share common attitudes, interests, or goals and, frequently, live together. 3. a group of people united and guided by certain convictions, beliefs, and morals. 4. relatives who love and care for one another deeply and oftentimes, put each others' needs and preferences before their own. 5. a group whose love is not hindered by time, space or circumstance.


Have you ever thought about what it means to be part of a family? It really is the most incredible thing. I am a part of a group of people who call each other family. We will love and be loved for the rest of our lives, no matter what. If you stop and think about what that actually means, it is one of the most powerful things to ever exist. Families come in all different shapes and sizes and are ever-evolving. As we start out our lives, we all have parents. Some of us have siblings, some don't. We usually grow up with grandparents, aunt, uncles and cousins. Eventually some of us add spouses and children to their families. We also sometimes lose family members along the way; sometimes, due to death, other times because of choice.

There is no such thing as a "broken family." Family is family, and is not determined by marriage certificates, divorce papers, and adoption documents. Families are made in the heart.” ― C. JoyBell C.

I have been so incredibly blessed with family. My parents and siblings have provided me with absolutely astounding love and support. Today I met a woman who did not have $12 to pay for a perscription at the pharmacy. Knowing that I will never have needs go unmet, simply because my family would not allow it, is a pretty incredible thing. Family is a safe place where I am never judged and always accepted. That is an amazing thing.

When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching -- they are your family. ” ― Jim Butcher

This rings so true to my heart. I also have a family that is not blood-related. This family is so incredibly special to me. There was a time in my life when I had no blood family nearby. This is when I found the other part of my family. Friends that are no longer friends. They are family. They will always be family.

My family is ever-changing, yet the most stable thing in my life. Family gets us through life and makes it worth living. I pray that everyone can experience family as I have. Life is so incredibly short. 

Love your family. Build your family up. Protect your family. Cherish your family. 

I sustain myself with the love of family.”
Maya Angelou

Sunday, March 21, 2010

I'm leaving on a jetplane...

I am so incredibly sad today. It is my last day in Northern Ireland with my brothers, sister, and nieces. I really hate hate hate leaving my family! I think it's stupid that we can't live by each other. And I hate the fact that I see them maybe once a year, if I'm lucky. Ugh.

But on a positive note, I have the absolute best family ever. My heart goes out to all of you who think you have the best family...you have been misled. I have the best family ever. Hands down. No competition. God has blessed me beyond belief with the most amazing siblings! And I just want to spend all my time with them! But instead of being Debbie Downer, I just try to enjoy the short times I have with them. So, if you are fortunate enough to live close to your family and see them on a regular basis, please enjoy the time you have with them. You never know what you have until it's 4,000 miles away.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

spoiled brats.

we are spoiled brats.

that has been my thought lately. and the more i think about it, the more pathetic i feel. i have come to the realization that i live my life with a blindfold on. i go throughout my day taking total advantage of everything around me. let me try to explain...

Ava, my three-year-old, is possibly the most detail oriented person i know. she doesn't miss a beat! i love this about her. we can be walking outside and she will notice the tiniest little ladybug and have to stop and watch it. she isn't concerned with where we are going or when we have to be there. all she cares about it experiencing this little creature. it's amazing how much i can learn from such a little person.

so that takes me to the thought- we are spoiled brats. we go through our days completely taking advantage of everything around us. as Donald Miller writes, "Life is staggering and we are just used to it." think about it. Life is staggering. a friend has a baby and we are happy for them and buy them a gift. but do we really take into account that this baby is a brand new life? it's just another baby. or sometimes it is just another funeral. sometimes it is just another sunset. Ava recently asked me to explained the sunrise and sunset. while trying to explain the earth's rotation to a three-year-old wasn't so easy but it got me thinking. i rarely even think about how incredible it is that the sun rises and sets, with such beauty, every single day of my life on earth and i rarely stop to even take it in. we are so spoiled. we go about our days with our oh-so-important agendas and forget about the simple-yet-astonishing things in life that God gives us everyday simply for our pleasure.

i guess what i am saying is, we have grown to ignore life while trying to live life. so take a step back, breathe life in, and enjoy what is surrounding you. it's amazing what you will find when you just look.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

i'm baaaaack...

Okay blogging world...I'm back! One of my new years resolutions was to write more..so here I am. I have been writing on paper but decided it was time to bring the blog back. I don't have to most consistent track record with blogging but this time will be different...I hope. So whether I have anything to say worth reading will be up for debate, but regardless, I will write.

Thanks for reading.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

three months.

i can't believe i have gone three months without blogging. i hate that. i love to write. i need to make it more of a priority. so here's a little update on my last three months.......

hmm...there hasn't exactly been that much change.  i don't know if that's good or bad. all i know is that i am ready for change! (haha, i kinda sound like an Obama groupie..) i just want to be different. you know what i mean? i'm not content with who i am right now. i need a little spring cleaning in my soul. i have been through a lot of crap in the past two years and i'm just ready to be done with it all. i'm ready for a fresh new life! now i just have to figure out what this looks like...and how to obtain it...

a few things i want to change...i need to read more. i need to be online less. i need to write more. i need to consistently exercise. i need more daily communication with Jesus. i guess i just need to be more disciplined. this is the plan. i'll let you know how it goes...

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

obsessed.

i am currently reading 'Crazy Love' by Frances Chan. it is an amazing read and i highly recommend it. 


"People who are obsessed with Jesus aren't consumed with their
personal safety and comfort above all else.
Obsessed people care more about God's kingdom coming to this 
earth than their own lives being shielded from pain 
or distress."


i want to be obsessed. i want to care more about God's glory than my own life continuing without pain and distress. the past two years of my life have been nothing but pain and distress, and honestly i can't say that i have been more concerned about God's glory than my own happiness. i want that to change though. i want Him to change that in me.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

is this really church?

so this is my current thought : "i wonder how many of us think we are attending church, when really what we are taking part in really isn't church at all."

let me explain how i got to this thought. on friday, i had a financial emergency come up. it was $1100 and i didn't have a choice but to pay it. i only had a couple hundred dollars in the bank. this was a problem. i was...distraught, to say the least. i was hyperventilating and couldn't control the tears. i literally didn't know what to do. i knew God would take care of me because He always does. but let's face it, He sometimes allows us to go through hard situations. so i knew God would take care of me, i just didn't know how or when. all i could see was unpaid bills in my future! i told my family and a couple friends what happened, just so they could pray for me. needless to say, i didn't sleep well that night. the next day i told my pastor about it. again, just for prayer and wisdom. what i got was something completely different than i expected or am used to. 

his words were, "don't worry. we will take care of you."  excuse me? what? that's right. it took all of one second for him to hear my need and know without consulting the other pastors, that they would without a doubt, take care of my need. wow. i was speechless. 

i mean absolutely no disrespect to the previous churches i have attended, but i couldn't help but feel like i have gone to church my entire life and this is the first time i have felt like i actually attend a "real" church. by "real" i mean, a church that has its priorities 100% in line with Christ and His word. this church puts taking care of its family members, and others in the community before a nice building with a nice mortgage payment. Christ calls us to take care of one another. to show His love to those who don't know Him. He never called us to have a nice building, with nice programs, and nice salaries. i have never felt like i would be taken care of no matter what hardships i go through. and i'm not just talking finances. i have never been prayed for like i have been at this church. i have never felt so cared for and loved. and it's so genuine. 

the past two years have been the hardest of my life, but at the same time, the sweetest. i have never experienced Gods love like this before. i am amazed. after i talked to my pastor i couldn't help but think "this is what church should look like".  i have attended church for 27 years and just now feel like i know what church really is. which brings me back to my first question...

"how many of us think we are attending church, when really what we are taking part in really isn't church at all?"